Principles of Empowerment to Teach your Children
There is so much talk these days of 'empowering' our children. But what does that really mean?
The power we desire for our children is not the outward power that bullies have over their victims but the inner power that a truly strong person has over the direction of their own life.
We can only give it to them by showing them what it looks like.
Power over our lives comes not from having the inner resources, because we were all born with them, but from knowing that those resources are always there within us whenever we need them. We just need to call on them.
That is the power we want for our children.
And this is the new spirituality that is emerging. Parents all over the world are asking themselves how they can pass on to their children a sense of spirituality and inner life without the doctrine of organised religion.
We all want our children to grow up with a belief in themselves and their ability to find their way out of any difficult situation knowing that they can be stronger and wiser for the experience.
We all want our children to find their own true path, follow their heart, and live a life of fulfillment and joy.
We need to let our children know that all they need is already inside them.
The following are metaphors for various aspects of our inner life. I offer these metaphors here to help parents find the language to begin to talk to their children about their inner life. Always be on the lookout for teachable moments to begin to introduce these concepts to your child. Each metaphor explains a different principle; personal power, inner guidance, giving, unlimited potential, learning from life's lessons, inner peace and service.
1/ Inner Guidance. The way in which you can begin to explain to your child about her inner guidance system is to liken it to a little voice within. Explain that there is a voice that whispers to us when we need to stop whatever it is we are doing, or when we need to change direction. If we don't listen at first then that whisper will get louder and will persist until it gets our attention. Accidents and sickness are out inner guides way of shouting at us to get our attention when we haven't been listening very well. When we are on the right path going the right way we feel good, life seems to flow and go well for us. Be guided by the silent voice within. Make your decisions by what feels good within your heart.
2/ Inner Peace. Teach your child that there is within him a place that he can go to where it is always calm and peaceful. This is his anchor when there are storms all around. If he can go deep down within himself to find the still waters he can anchor himself to his inner source of wisdom, strength and emotional balance. All the answers to all his questions are there within.
3/Unlimited Potential. The degree to which our children can grow and become great is dependent only on their ability to believe in themselves, think positive thoughts and dream big. Teach them that they have in their hearts the seeds to become whatever they want. Their potential is unlimited. What do seeds need in order to grow? They need to be nurtured regularly, little and often, and they require the patience that knows that the flowers will eventually grow and bear fruit. Think of a little acorn looking up longingly at Grandpa Oak. He should have no doubt at all that he too will grow to be tall and mighty for he has the seed within him. How much greater then are your children who have, not just one seed as the acorn has, but all the seeds to become whatever he wants. Everything is possible.
4/ Personal Power. Our little boys hit the age of about five and get seriously into superheroes. This is their way of experimenting with the idea of power. What a perfect opportunity to talk to them (and their sisters) about the only true power, Inner Strength. Explain to your child that there is a strength within us. This is the power we can draw upon in times of trouble or when we are required to do great feats. There is no true power in manipulating or bullying others into doing what you want. A truly powerful person is one who can take his strength and use it to do great deeds, to make positive changes in the world and to help others. This strenth is also the passion that drives us on in spite of obstacles and difficulties. It is like a fire within. We can let our inner fire run wild to ravage and destroy like a forest fire, or we can focus our flame and, like a craftsman transforms base metal into a beautiful piece of jewelery, create something of beauty and goodness with our lives. What will your child use his power for? Let him know that it is his choice.
5/ Life's Lessons. Life is constantly giving us lessons. Some may call them 'difficulties', 'problems', 'mistakes' or 'failures'. Give your child the gift of a new language. Call them 'challenges', or 'lessons from life'. Just as the flowers would not grow without the rain, so your child would not grow, learn and become strong without a few tears; a chance to flex his spiritual muscles. And after all, there is always sunshine after the rain.
6/ Giving. The secret of abundance in life. When we give it is because we expect there to be more of whatever we're giving. We ask for nothing in return and have no worry of going without. It is so natural for young children to give and share their things, their love and their light. Like the sun they give and ask nothing in return. This is the natural way of things. If the sun were not to shine, the flowers would not open and the bees would have no nectar to make honey for their young. Giving starts off a chain reaction and the excitement is watching where your giving will take you and watching the miracles that occur as a result.
7/ Service. How do we make a difference in the world? What are we here for? We are all stars and are meant to shine brightly. Teach your child that we shine brightly when we use the gifts and talents we were born with for the good of others. He was born with special talents and gifts that he intended to use in this lifetime, to bring to the world an energy all his own. Let him know that he has something positive to offer others, that the world needs what he has to give.
If we as parents can stay anchored ourselves to our connection with our own Higher Self when our child comes to us in times of difficulty and in those teachable moments, then we can fill him up with empowering messages that he will hopefully hear and internalise.
And thus we give him the greatest gift a mother can give her child; the power and the self-talk that will make him light-footed on his path, when his journey takes him on ahead of us to places where we can no longer reach to help him, and then every stumbling block along his way will become a stepping stone to a higher place...
The power we desire for our children is not the outward power that bullies have over their victims but the inner power that a truly strong person has over the direction of their own life.
We can only give it to them by showing them what it looks like.
Power over our lives comes not from having the inner resources, because we were all born with them, but from knowing that those resources are always there within us whenever we need them. We just need to call on them.
That is the power we want for our children.
And this is the new spirituality that is emerging. Parents all over the world are asking themselves how they can pass on to their children a sense of spirituality and inner life without the doctrine of organised religion.
We all want our children to grow up with a belief in themselves and their ability to find their way out of any difficult situation knowing that they can be stronger and wiser for the experience.
We all want our children to find their own true path, follow their heart, and live a life of fulfillment and joy.
We need to let our children know that all they need is already inside them.
The following are metaphors for various aspects of our inner life. I offer these metaphors here to help parents find the language to begin to talk to their children about their inner life. Always be on the lookout for teachable moments to begin to introduce these concepts to your child. Each metaphor explains a different principle; personal power, inner guidance, giving, unlimited potential, learning from life's lessons, inner peace and service.
1/ Inner Guidance. The way in which you can begin to explain to your child about her inner guidance system is to liken it to a little voice within. Explain that there is a voice that whispers to us when we need to stop whatever it is we are doing, or when we need to change direction. If we don't listen at first then that whisper will get louder and will persist until it gets our attention. Accidents and sickness are out inner guides way of shouting at us to get our attention when we haven't been listening very well. When we are on the right path going the right way we feel good, life seems to flow and go well for us. Be guided by the silent voice within. Make your decisions by what feels good within your heart.
2/ Inner Peace. Teach your child that there is within him a place that he can go to where it is always calm and peaceful. This is his anchor when there are storms all around. If he can go deep down within himself to find the still waters he can anchor himself to his inner source of wisdom, strength and emotional balance. All the answers to all his questions are there within.
3/Unlimited Potential. The degree to which our children can grow and become great is dependent only on their ability to believe in themselves, think positive thoughts and dream big. Teach them that they have in their hearts the seeds to become whatever they want. Their potential is unlimited. What do seeds need in order to grow? They need to be nurtured regularly, little and often, and they require the patience that knows that the flowers will eventually grow and bear fruit. Think of a little acorn looking up longingly at Grandpa Oak. He should have no doubt at all that he too will grow to be tall and mighty for he has the seed within him. How much greater then are your children who have, not just one seed as the acorn has, but all the seeds to become whatever he wants. Everything is possible.
4/ Personal Power. Our little boys hit the age of about five and get seriously into superheroes. This is their way of experimenting with the idea of power. What a perfect opportunity to talk to them (and their sisters) about the only true power, Inner Strength. Explain to your child that there is a strength within us. This is the power we can draw upon in times of trouble or when we are required to do great feats. There is no true power in manipulating or bullying others into doing what you want. A truly powerful person is one who can take his strength and use it to do great deeds, to make positive changes in the world and to help others. This strenth is also the passion that drives us on in spite of obstacles and difficulties. It is like a fire within. We can let our inner fire run wild to ravage and destroy like a forest fire, or we can focus our flame and, like a craftsman transforms base metal into a beautiful piece of jewelery, create something of beauty and goodness with our lives. What will your child use his power for? Let him know that it is his choice.
5/ Life's Lessons. Life is constantly giving us lessons. Some may call them 'difficulties', 'problems', 'mistakes' or 'failures'. Give your child the gift of a new language. Call them 'challenges', or 'lessons from life'. Just as the flowers would not grow without the rain, so your child would not grow, learn and become strong without a few tears; a chance to flex his spiritual muscles. And after all, there is always sunshine after the rain.
6/ Giving. The secret of abundance in life. When we give it is because we expect there to be more of whatever we're giving. We ask for nothing in return and have no worry of going without. It is so natural for young children to give and share their things, their love and their light. Like the sun they give and ask nothing in return. This is the natural way of things. If the sun were not to shine, the flowers would not open and the bees would have no nectar to make honey for their young. Giving starts off a chain reaction and the excitement is watching where your giving will take you and watching the miracles that occur as a result.
7/ Service. How do we make a difference in the world? What are we here for? We are all stars and are meant to shine brightly. Teach your child that we shine brightly when we use the gifts and talents we were born with for the good of others. He was born with special talents and gifts that he intended to use in this lifetime, to bring to the world an energy all his own. Let him know that he has something positive to offer others, that the world needs what he has to give.
If we as parents can stay anchored ourselves to our connection with our own Higher Self when our child comes to us in times of difficulty and in those teachable moments, then we can fill him up with empowering messages that he will hopefully hear and internalise.
And thus we give him the greatest gift a mother can give her child; the power and the self-talk that will make him light-footed on his path, when his journey takes him on ahead of us to places where we can no longer reach to help him, and then every stumbling block along his way will become a stepping stone to a higher place...